Recently, my buying-books-hobby has gotten completely out of control (I swear I will read all of them eventually). It’s just one of my many coping strategies that has slowly escalated over time and has become more noticeable as I approach middle age (and I have a little -only a little- more cash to spend than when I was a student).
Granted, in the whole scheme of things, this particular coping strategy might not feature in The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Illnesses (I’m told this is still considered to be the bible of diagnosing any and all mental illnesses). But the whole book-buying business (from deciding to step into a book shop to, upon my return, ending up dumping my newly acquired treasures to an already growing pile of books on my dinner table) is playing havoc on my reward system. Google tells me this is definitely considered to be addictive behaviour. (Whilst writing this, I take note that I might be catastrophising and self-diagnosing, which are two wholly unhelpful forms of modern-day sensemaking.)
I thought being digitally accountable on Goodreads would help tackle my ever-increasing affliction (yes, I’ve finally succumbed to registering and being digitally monitored; I figured I’m not really interesting enough to track). But registering on Goodreads has definitely back-fired. My ‘currently reading’ list has now become longer than my ‘reading challenge’ list, which is not a good thing and is adding to my guilt and anxiety. And I’ve long-since given up on updating the ‘want to read’ list; life is just too short.
But, as this blog (hopefully) will show, I haven’t completely given up on being digitally accountable. As a last-ditch attempt to use my time mildly constructively and, at the same time, get through some of these books full of knowledge and sensemaking stories, I am starting this blog. Have I mentioned my ever-growing collection of coffee-table art exhibition books?! I will focus on making sense of this day and age, mostly by means of what -cultural- life has to offer. Far greater and more creative minds have grappled with their ‘life and times’, which has resulted in an endless amount of non AI-generated works of art in books, art, film, theatre, etc. I look forward to finding out what these great minds have to share.
I’m currently sitting in the cafe of a bookshop, having just bought yet another book… or two. The fact that I have started to read one of them only makes me feel a little bit better. From the corner of my eye I see a screen advertising a job opening at the bookshop. Perhaps…?
Ah no, I am not in a sound state of mind to make any big life-changing decisions at the moment. I recently learned that my dearest 95-year-old-great-auntie-more-like-a-grannie passed away after a short bout of pneumonia (and old age). Obviously this accounts for my rather pensive and melancholy mood. And although this might not be everybody’s idea of a first great entertaining blog post, it might just be where this blog on making sense of modern life ought to start.
I feel the need to end this first post with a weighty and meaningful thought. …Alas, nothing comes to mind. Will leave that for another day…
Sensemaking.blog 